Surah Aal-`Imraan 3:159

by Umm Layth in Deeni Issues, Selected Aayaat

Bismillaah

In the comments of this entry, I said that I would type up the Tafseer of 3:159 (well just really the major relevant part) from Ma`arif al-Qur’aan. However, I think it would be more beneficial to read the entirety of it and so instead of typing it up (since it is long), I will just be giving the pages to the scanned version bi’ithnillaah. May Allaah reward those who have taken on this great task, aameen

The ayah is:

فَبِمَا رَحْمَةٍ مِّنَ اللّهِ لِنتَ لَهُمْ وَلَوْ كُنتَ فَظًّا غَلِيظَ الْقَلْبِ لاَنفَضُّواْ مِنْ حَوْلِكَ فَاعْفُ عَنْهُمْ وَاسْتَغْفِرْ لَهُمْ وَشَاوِرْهُمْ فِي الأَمْرِ فَإِذَا عَزَمْتَ فَتَوَكَّلْ عَلَى اللّهِ إِنَّ اللّهَ يُحِبُّ الْمُتَوَكِّلِينَ

“So, it is through mercy from Allah that you are gentle to them. Had you been rough and hard-hearted, they would have dispersed from around you. So, pardon them and seek Forgiveness for them. And consult them in the matter, and once you have taken a decision place your trust in Allah. Surely, allah loves those who place their trust in Him.”

http://www.islamibayanaat.com/EnglishMaarifulQuran/English-MaarifulQuran-MuftiShafiUsmaniRA-Vol-2-Page-173-228.pdf <– it starts at the end of page 51 of this document.

http://www.islamibayanaat.com/EnglishMaarifulQuran/English-MaarifulQuran-MuftiShafiUsmaniRA-Vol-2-Page-229-283.pdf <– and it ends on page 10 of this document.

‘Don’t Judge Me’

by Umm Layth in Contemplations, Deeni Issues, Ummah Problems

Bismillaah

It has become so common for people to call each other extremists, modernists, misguided etc… Now it also seems very popular for people to say, ‘Don’t Judge’ and to call people away from al-amr bil ma`ruf wa nahi an al-munkar.

Sometimes I sit there in amazement when I hear of Muslims who are (without a doubt) doing evil and when someone says that such and such is not acceptable by Islaam they are the first to be called extremists and judgemental people. But I wonder what really makes them say such? Do they believe that commanding the good and forbidding the evil is extremism? Or do they just want to find a way to escape the reality of their own actions by turning the table and making those who are calling them to good look like the evil ones?

One of my biggest struggles since my downfall has been looking at my own faults before looking at the faults of others. Indeed, it is a very hard task. But I see a difference in judging (atleast in the way I am referring to it now) and standing up for the truth. Nowadays, you can simply say to someone that an action is wrong and they will tell you not to judge them. They will assume you are condemning them to the hellfire simply for the correction. I think we all understand that Allaah is The Judge but I think what Muslims fail to understand is that our Deen was given to us so that we could judge by it. So if anything, maybe we should be complaining to Allaah for having given us this Law and expecting us to abide by it?

We aren’t people who can open the hearts and we haven’t been given the right to say what a person’s intention may be if they haven’t conveyed it. But does that mean that we don’t correct a munkar when it is happening? If I see a sister on the street talking to a non-Muslim man, flirting, do I just ignore it because ‘we shouldn’t judge’? Is this what our beloved Nabi (sallAllaahu `alayhi wa sallam) taught us and is this the example of our Sahaba? Last time I remember, Allaah said in the Qur’aan “Help you one another in al-Birr and at-Taqwa; but do not help one another in sin and transgression. And fear Allaah.”

What does this verse mean to people anymore? Does it mean that we watch as people sin and worry only about ourselves or does it mean that we try our best in calling people to what is right, while we work on our own persons as well? Why do some people assume that if one corrects someone that they have stopped working on themselves? This seems like some judging to me as well!

In our Journey to Allaah class, I asked Shaykh `Abdul Kareem Yahya a question that I have had trouble with (due to the constant attacks of people). If we are failing in our own deeds but we see evil, know that it is wrong and have the knowledge to prove it is wrong, do we correct them or do we leave them because of our own faults? I mean to anyone it would seem like hypocrisy to tell someone that they are doing something wrong when they themselves are lacking in their religion right? Well, his response was very clear. He said that we have 3 obligations: learning, applying and teaching and though we may be lacking in one or two, it is better to fulfill atleast one of these obligations. So yes, I may be lacking in my religion myself and atleast I acknowledge it and try to better myself, but does that mean I don’t teach what I do know because of my own faults? If one believes that it is haram or makruh to do so, they need to understand that none of us will ever reach perfection as we are only humans. That is why our Beloved Messenger (sallAllaahu `alayhi wa sallam) told us, ‘All of the Children of Aadam make mistakes and the best of those who make mistakes are those who repent.’ So we will never be perfect and so there is no way that we can say ‘Only judge when you reach a state of perfection’. In fact, it is ridiculous because those people who go on and on about not judging would also have to judge before telling someone that.

We don’t know what occurs behind doors but if there is evil happening in public don’t expect to be free of criticism. Women out there not wearing a Khimaar (yes, the proper word for headscarf) need to expect to be corrected. Why? Because without a doubt Allaah commanded every believing woman out there to cover with a khimaar and it is clear that not doing so is a sign of disobedience. Men out there who you see flirting on the streets can’t expect not to be criticised. Have some shame in front of your Lord and stop worrying about people. It isn’t those people who remind you of your wrong doing that you should be worrying about. In fact, you should be thankful people actually care enough to counsel you but indeed we should be ashamed of ourselves in front of the One who has created us and commanded us. And yes, I’m not ignoring the fact that sometimes our naseeha is lacking wisdom or that there are people out there who only want to make people look bad (character assasination). Our intentions should always be to call our brother or sister to what is better because we want for them what we want for ourselves but if we fail a bit in our counsel, that should not stop us from accepting the point of the advice. And please really note that these same people that continue with the don’t judge me stuff tend to rip apart the hearts of the people who give them naseeha after they assume that one is acting ’self-righteous’ or has this ‘holier than thou’ attitude. So please apply for yourself what you want others to apply.

Also, Iman is not simply belief in the heart. Some people are always on about how just because one is not fulfilling an obligation it doesn’t mean that they are evil people but o brother and o sister, part of Iman is that you obey Allaah with your limbs. We will be accountable for what our hearts hold and if our hearts really love Allaah, we will be working to implement as much as we can externally as well as internally. The Prophet (sallAllaahu `alayhi wa sallam) mentioned many times that such and such was a part of Iman and many of these things were actions such as hayaa. Is hayaa in our hearts only? Is removing a barrier from the road an action of the heart or is it an action of the limbs?

There is a balance really. If we fail to understand such simple principles, then we have got to give more time for learning because that truly means we haven’t done our part. These issues are so simple and shouldn’t even be our concern now. We have to look at the problems for what they are. Muslims are failing in their deen and though it is normal, we can’t expect to better ourselves if we close ourselves from the counsel of our brothers and sisters. Maybe we need to re-read Surah al`asr and really contemplate what this reminding that Allaah mentions refers to.

It’s time that we grow up a bit and accept our own shortcomings and that we remember that there are consequences to our actions that Allaah has clearly mentioned. Sometimes reminding people of these consequences makes them assume you are condemning them but please think about it without looking at it so deeply. Who wants to earn Allaah’s wrath? None of us. So we should focus on our errors and the possible problems we will get from them in the Hereafter. It’s also time that we have husn al-dhann both ways. If I hear of a sister not wearing a khimaar, I will assume that she is struggling and needs encouragement (unless she states she just doesn’t want to wear it) but that won’t stop me from telling her that she has to fulfill her obligations and that won’t stop me from encouraging her - so also don’t assume that if I do correct her that I believe I am better. It’s part of being an Ummah and part of being a brick of this building that we all claim to be a part of. If we don’t want to be that brick, then just don’t be that brick because a strong brick is better than a weak brick.

May Allaah Subhaanahu wa ta`alaa guide us all and forgive us for the extremism that appears from a whole lot of different angles, aameen

Ten Things: My 1st Tag!

by Umm Layth in Random Fun

Bismillaah

I’m gonna have to think hard now because I was tagged by Sr. Aaminah, but I think this will be fun! I’m gonna open up a bit so do pardon me if I say too much.

People who get tagged must write in a blog of their own ten weird things or habits or little known facts as well as state this rule clearly. At the end you must choose six people to be tagged and list their names. No tagbacks!

1. I can’t whistle. Yup, it’s true. My mom is the type that you can hear from blocks away and though I’ve tried really hard I just can’t do it.

2. I’ve owned about 20 some cats in total. In fact, I had 14 cats at once but yeah they weren’t indoor cats but still they were ours and man did they get pregnant a lot! My husband & I just got rid of our 2nd cat that we have had together because our apt was just not big enough, I was developing allergies (for the first time?), we were too busy to spend time with him like he needed and everytime the heat went on I could smell its litter and gosh even though it had a cover… it just stunk! And yeah it was really hard to give him up for adoption but we found out a few weeks ago that a family adopted him… so maybe this will be better for him.

3. Before Islaam I was aiming to become a singer. I loved singing, I wrote my own songs and tried out at different things. My mom recorded me since I was very little and they (my mom and dad) prepared videos and stuff so they could send it to a program called Sabado Gigante but then I got sidetracked with learning about Islaam alhamdulillaah and all that went down the drain (grateful for it indeed!). I still love to sing and write but it is obviously private.

4. I love that rush you get from rollercoasters, riding a bike down a very steep hill, roller blading (even though I’ve always sucked at rollerblading) etc. Seriously, the rush is just expectacular! [Sippable Milkshakes from Steak & Shake give me that rush too. mmmm]

5.  I cry a lot. It can be because of happiness, anger or whatever but yeah if it’s overwhelming I cry. I try sometimes to breath and relax when I don’t want any tears to come out but the minute I start thinking about it I just cry. And yeah I can’t change.

6. I love when people speak spanish, comment on me being fully covered and think I can’t understand. I just love their reaction when I turn to them and speak in spanish and they realize that not only can I understand and speak but I can also speak their language! Mwahahaha

7. I was teased in school for stupid things. Firstly, because I was a quiet Mexicana; to fit in you had to be loud like the others. Secondly, my parents shopped for me and would always get what I didn’t like or what didn’t fit in and I was teased about it. It could have been the bright Payless shoes my dad bought me or the non-Jansport backpack (everyone had to have them) that I took to school. It was just miserable but it taught me a lot. I didn’t want to be like everyone else but I felt so pressured to be like them so that I wouldn’t be picked on for such stupidity.

8. I really can’t stand putting clothes away. I just think that they are going to end up in the laundry basket anyways, have to be washed and folded again and it just doesn’t seem worth it. Ga3!

9. I really don’t care if I match or not. My husband does. Even though I cover fully he wants it to look nice and though I don’t blame him, I just don’t care lol but I still make sure I match for him. Unfortunately, I have too many khumoor that just sit there because I don’t have the ‘right’ color of niqaabs. (BTW: If someone knows where I can get a white abaya and a white khimaar to go with my white niqaab, please let me know!)

10. I’m such a panzy when it comes to animals (except cats). I can’t pick up our hamster and I have to wear gloves when we pick up our rebellious cockatiel. lol When we had our rabbit, I was sooo scared of its legs and sudden kicks. And it amazes me that my son hasn’t been scared like I have with some of our animals. I mean he did put vaseline on our old hamster, he put the rabbit on the stove (it was off!) and oh yeah put the cat in the fridge. So how much fear could he have possibly had? Not much I say. Poor animals.

Update (April 14 07): I decided to change one of the people I tagged because they aren’t doing it! So I switched it over to my husband. If Najaat doesn’t post it soon, I am going to change you too! (Only difference between you and the other sister, is that you actually said you were gonna do it and I’m waiting!)  So yeah : D. Who do I tag? Hmm.. Umm Hasan, Umm Khawlah (please?), Editor (Yup), `A’ishah, Najaat (I may know too much already) and my husband!

Now make du`aa’ for me please because it kind of hurt my brain to think of things that may show I am not as boring as I think I am.

Recommended Readings

by Umm Layth in *The Muslimah*, Deeni Issues, Recommended Readings

Bismillaah

These are some readings that I recommend be read (if you haven’t already). I shared these with my husband because they benefited me tremendously and I hope that you too can benefit from them.

An Example of the Prophet’s Perfection : An example that will increase your love for our Beloved (sallAllaahu `alayhi wa sallam).

Your Faith is an Apple Seed : A thoughtful and inspiring analogy.

On Islamic Womanhood: Iman : On the importance of the Islaamic identity for a Muslim woman.

Reality Bits : Some thoughts on the anticipation of Jannah and the importance of both this life and the hereafter.

Random Confessions

by Umm Layth in Contemplations

I miss my family so much. I had my husband’s mother over for the weekend and it was quite nice but it made me miss my mom, my brothers and sister. As for my father… sigh… there are too many problems there but I do miss him.

…I feel quite lonely sometimes. I wonder many times who my real friends truly are and I realize true friends are few but I am thankful for the one true friend I know I have in this dunyaa and that is my beloved husband, may Allaah protect him always, aameen

I’ve always been rebellious and I know I can be a bit hard-headed sometimes and it really does suck. It’s hard to break myself of some habits and it is hard to sometimes accept my own shortcomings but it feels good when I am able to recognize a mistake and accept it.

… I miss parts of my old self. I used to read all the time and bringing it back to a habit has been hard.

I admit that I have so many saved drafts for my blog that I never dare to publish. They are opinions on so many topics but I am afraid to share them with the world and it kills me because that’s why I write them. My latest entry is called ‘The Ideal Muslimah’ but I just can’t press publish.

… I love sitting down and watching our fish tank. It soothes my heart.

In a few weeks our life will be changing again, insha’Allaah and I am very stressed about it. I don’t know how well I will handle the changes and sometimes I cry because of it.

…I hate lacking in my deen and I hate knowing that I’m not the best mother and wife I could be.

I hate how much I think. I think way too much. I wake up in the middle night suddenly and just think about every possible thing until I feel like I am going to go insane.

…I want to make up my mind on one particular matter but me and my husband haven’t came to an agreement on it yet and it sucks. It’s minor but still important.

I love my son. He’s my darling… he can be such a 3 year old lol but I just adore that boy masha’allaah, may Allaah protect him from harm, aameen

make du`aa’ for my family’s guidance please

Remember Me - I will remember you

by Umm Layth in Food for the Soul, Selected Aayaat

فَاذْكُرُونِي أَذْكُرْكُمْ وَاشْكُرُواْ لِي وَلاَ تَكْفُرُونِ

Remember Me - I will remember you.

Give thanks to Me and do not be ungrateful. [Surah al-Baqarah 2:152]

Remember Me – I will remember you

Allāh’s remembering of us signifies reward. The root meaning of the word for remembering (dhikr) is to be aware with the heart of what is remembered and awake to it. Dhikr with the tongue is called dhikr because it indicates the remembrance of the heart. It is often used, however, with reference to the spoken words and phrases employed in its performance.

The āyah means: “Remember Me by obeying Me and I will remember you with the reward and forgiveness”, as Sa’īd ibn Jubayr said. He also said, “Dhikr is obeying Allāh. Anyone who does not obey Him does not remember Him, even if he does a lot of glorification, shahāda and recitation of the Qur’ān.” It is related that the Prophet (Sallallāhu ‘alayhi wa Sallam), said, “Anyone who obeys Allāh has remembered Allāh, even if he has not done much prayer, fasting, or good action. Anyone who disobeys Allāh has forgotten Allāh, even if he has done a lot of prayer, fasting and good action.” As-SuddÄ« said, “A person does not remember Allāh without Allāh remembering Him. A believer does not remember Allāh without Allāh remembering him with mercy. An unbeliever does not remember Allāh without Allāh remembering him with the punishment.”

Someone said to Abū ‘Uthmān an-Nahdī, “We remember Allāh but we do not experience any sweetness in our hearts.” He said, “Praise Allāh Almighty for the fact that He has adorned one of your limbs with obedience!” Dhūn-Nūn al-Misrī said, ‘Anyone who really remembers Allāh, forgets everything except His remembrance and Allāh preserves him from every bad thing and is His redress for everything.” Mu’ādh ibn Jabal said, “The son of ādam does not do any action which will be more effective in saving him from the punishment of Allāh than dhikr of Allāh.”

There are many ahādÄ«th on the virtue of dhikr and its reward. Ibn Mājah reports from ‘Abdullāh ibn YÅ«suf that a Bedouin told the Messenger of Allāh (Sallallāhu ‘alayhi wa Sallam), “The laws of Islām are a lot for me. Tell me something on which I can really concentrate my efforts.” He said, “Let your tongue remain moist with the remembrance of Allāh Almighty.” It is transmitted that AbÅ« Hurayrah, may Allāh bless him and grant him peace, said, “Allāh Almighty says, ‘I am with my slave when he remembers Me and moves his lips with My Name.’”

Give thanks to Me

Thankfulness (shukr) is to acknowledge kindness received and to speak of it. The linguistic root of shukr means “to display”. So Allāh’s slave shows his thankfulness by mentioning Allāh’s goodness to Him and the Real thanks the slave by praising him for obeying Him.

and do not be ungrateful

Do not be ungrateful for Allāh’s blessings. The word kufr here means to cover up the blessing, not total disbelief.

[Tafsir al-Qurtubi: Translated by Aisha Bewley]

walal-aakhiratu khayrul-laka minal-’oolaa

by Umm Layth in Contemplations, Deeni Issues, Food for the Soul

وَلَلْآخِرَةُ خَيْرٌ لَّكَ مِنَ الْأُولَى

And indeed the Hereafter is better for you than the present. (Ad-Duha 93:4) 

O you who are enjoying the bounty of this world, you will soon depart with your bounty! How fine is this piece of poetry of one of the poets: “Listen, for you are able to hear; if you do not take the initiative it will be too late. Eat as you like and live in ease, the end of all of this is death”. Soon, your wealth and your span of life will vanish, your eyesight will weaken, your mind will lose its sanity and your capacity for food and drink will decrease. You will see the pleasures but you will be unable to have anything of them. Your wife and children will hate you and wish for your death. Care and grief will be thrown on you. This world will abandon you and the hereafter will accept you. If you have good deeds in the hereafter, it will receive you and enfold you in its bosom, but if you have no such deeds, the grave will be your place and the Fire will be your final abode. What is this illusion (that you are in)? The Prophet (Salla Allah ta’ala ‘alayhi wa sallam) used to say: “(Real) living is the living of the hereafter”, and repeated it to himself and to his companions (Radhiya Allah ta’ala ‘anhum).

Continue Reading »

In His remembrance your heart will find its peace

by Umm Layth in Anasheed, Contemplations, Food for the Soul

Songs of Innocence

Listen

chorus
Allahu Allahu La ilaha illa Hu

And I sing my songs of innocence
To you my precious child as you lay on your bed
With your sleepy eyes and your heavy head
Rest and dream in peace till morning comes again

I will sing my songs of innocence
I will sing my songs of innocence

And I sing my songs of innocence
As I watch you sleep, think what may lie ahead.
So many the roads that before you spread
Take the way, my child, to the Beloved Friend

Lead a life of truth and innocence
The way of sunnah, the path of the Prophet
Let your words be echoes of his sentences
Let your deeds be shadows of his radiance.

And though the world outside seems cold and hard
And you may feel like you are wandering alone
Do not fear, do not grieve, in Allah place your belief
In His remembrance your heart will find its peace

Continue Reading »

Disruption caused by daycare

by Umm Layth in News, Parenting

SPENDING a year or more in a long-daycare centre increases the likelihood that a child will be disruptive at school.

A year of childcare ‘disrupts’

Child care was defined as regularly scheduled care by anyone other than the child’s mother, lasting at least 10 hours per week. Quality child care is complex to define but includes having trained caregivers and a low child-to-caregiver ratio.

The study found in 2001 that children who were in child care were more likely to be aggressive and defiant in kindergarten. Monday’s study follows them into the fifth and sixth grades.

http://www.nytimes.com/reuters/news/news-children-daycare.html

Another Death

by Umm Layth in Contemplations

Bismillaah

My grandmother passed away today. She wasn’t Muslim and I never got to call her to Islaam because she was in Mexico and I am not. The last time we saw each other was when I was about 6 or 7 years old. We spoke on the phone and stuff but due to so many family problems, our talk time was always limited.

Whatever the case, my mother is so down. She had just came back last week from Mexico because she hadn’t been feeling well and this week her mother passed. My grandmother had been suffering from cancer and all types of problems and was in so much pain. My mother feels guilty for leaving so suddenly because she stopped eating after she left but I reminded her that when it is our time to go that’s it. It brought her up some but a certain entity in the family, who should be supporting her right now, is only making her life harder.

Death is the scariest of all trials and what frightens me the most is death hitting very close to home. I wish I could be by my mother right now but I can’t and plus she is leaving for Mexico soon for the funeral and all.

To know that there is so much suffering in this world and that many people will suffer in both this life and in the Hereafter is hard to think about. I don’t want to go through struggles in this life and lose my Hereafter. We really need to work on ourselves and continue to make sincere du`aa’ to Allaah to guide our families. We can’t give up on them because we don’t know what Allaah has planned.

May Allaah guide our non-Muslim families to the truth and make us steadfast in our religion, aameen

Inna lillahi wa inna ilayhi raji`oon